“letting go of my self”
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Last week some people in our group said that they found the passage “scary.’ In the past they had even avoided reading it. This week one description of the text was “hard things that encourage.” What changed?
Reminders
Reading the passage with an eye for observation reveals several instances of words or phrases that indicate knowledge or assurance or confidence. At least half of these include words like “by this” or “because” explaining how we achieve that knowledge.
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- By this … are obvious (v. 10)
- We know … because (v. 14)
- You know… (v. 15)
- We know … by this (v. 16)
- We will know … by this (v. 19a)
- … will assure … (v. 19b)
- … have confidence … (v. 21b)
- We know … by this (v. 24b)
Careful observation provides numerous other facts about the passage, but the theme of knowledge seems to be foremost in John’s thinking. In fact, expanding the search shows that knowledge (what we know) has been and will continue to be a major theme in John’s letter (e.g., 2:29, 3:2b, 3:5, 4:2, 4:6b, 4:13, 4:16. 5:2, 5:13, 5:15, 5:18, 5:19, 5:20). Those numerous references relate to the facts that we know. John makes many other references to “knowing” God as a result of knowing those facts.
After John impresses on us the seriousness of sin (the “scary” parts of the previous passage), he immediately provides comforting assurance aimed at genuine believers. That assurance is based on objective, observable evidence set off by words such as “by this” or “because.”
Is John telling them something they already know? Yes and no. John is telling them what they know, but that knowledge has been muddled and even obscured. The congregation hears a variety of conflicting opinions offered by outside teachers. Some of these teachers come from pagan backgrounds, questioning if the divine Christ was really a human being. Others from Jewish heritage would argue against the man Jesus being the Messiah.
As someone in our group mentioned, we are not John’s original audience. Those first-century believers have nothing like our general Christian knowledge. We take for granted the incarnation, and the divine and human nature of Jesus Christ, and his death, burial, resurrection, and ascension. It is difficult for us to imagine the first-century stress of deciding which differing doctrines to accept and which to reject.
John’s thought now returns to “the beginning” and especially the core message that permeates his whole letter.
This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all.
(1 John 1:5)
In the present passage, the apostle is reminding them of what they have known since they first heard that message expressed in the gospel. What is true of that original audience also applies to us. Conflicting doctrines can shift our focus away from what we know. We need our memories refreshed.
Men more frequently require to be reminded than informed.[1]
Then the question remains, “What does John need to remind them about?”
What Do We Know? How Do We Know It?
Even though we may have more understanding of orthodox Christian doctrine, we also need frequent reminders. Those reminders will help us, as they helped John’s first readers, make wise choices in belief and in behavior.
Spiritual Parentage
John has already made reference to knowing spiritual parentage based on behavior.
If you know that He is righteous, you know that everyone also who practices righteousness is born of Him.
(1 John 2:29)
Now he begins his rapid-fire reminders with this same foundational fact.
By this the children of God and the children of the devil are obvious: anyone who does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor the one who does not love his brother.
(1 John 3:10)
Not only do we know this, but John says it is “obvious” (φανερός, phaneros; “visible, clear, plain, known”).[2] He includes the “visible” evidence: practicing (or “doing”) righteousness. Then he elaborates. The fundamental starting point of practicing righteousness is love of the brother.
John is not finished with this topic. Once again he points back to the beginning.
For this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another;
(1 John 3:11)
Then he adds the example of Cain’s murder of his brother, Abel, emphasizing Cain’s spiritual parentage.
not as Cain, who was of the evil one and slew his brother.
(1 John 3:12a, emphasis added)
Then John brings out the contemporary application. Cain’s motivation continued then and now because “many antichrists have appeared” (2:18). Like Cain, the contemporary world is hostile to righteousness.
And for what reason did he slay him? Because his deeds were evil, and his brother’s were righteous. Do not be surprised, brethren, if the world hates you.
(1 John 12b-13)
Whatever the world around us does, or what they say about us, we know their spiritual parentage. And we know ours. John describes the source as obvious and indicated by relational holiness versus relational sin.
Spiritual Life
Being hated by the world (3:13) sounds overwhelming. A culture divided between pagan polytheism and Jewish monotheism will not be welcoming to orthodox Christians. More culturally acceptable (“politically correct”) beliefs were suggested by others who had left the congregation (3:19). How can those remaining know who is right?
John reminds them of another reality: life versus death.
We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren.
(1 John 3:14)
Just as breathing and a pulse are the signs of life in the physical body, love of the brethren provides knowledge of spiritual life. Something has changed significantly. Evidence of spiritual life shows in the ability and even in the desire to love others. If the characteristic attitude of the world toward believers is hate (3:13), the contrast in believers is obvious.
As has happened in the past, our conversation turned to the contrast between self obsession and God obsession. The world, like Cain, expresses self obsession (nothing matters more than my comfort and happiness at any cost to others) in self-protective rejection of righteousness. The regenerate person has the renewed heart and the indwelling Spirit (vv. 3:24, ff.). That person is in the continuous process of moving from self obsession to God obsession (nothing matters more than God’s glory at any cost to myself). That slow, often agonizing, and regularly inconsistent process changes our perception of others and stirs our desire to show God’s love.
We know we have spiritual life by our other-worldly desire to love the brothers. But how? What do we do to show love to others?
Evidence of Love
John anticipates that question, and he has the only adequate answer.
We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.
(1 John 3:16)
John is echoing Jesus’s own words.
Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.
(John 13:15)
However, the apostle recognizes that not every believer will be asked to die for others (the ultimate “laying down” of life). He extends the application in very practical terms.
But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him? Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth.
(1 John 3:17-18)
Having the world’s goods (“resources,”[3] “material possessions;”[4] βίος, bios, lit. “life”) seems to be a relatively low threshold. (Some translations that render the verse as “rich” or “wealthy” or “living well” seem to overstate the meaning. These translations allow a possible excuse for avoiding the verse.) As someone in our group pointed out, “worldly goods” (lit. “life”) would have a very different meaning for the original audience. Many were probably “living on the edge.” Their Christian practice could result in rejection by family and loss of jobs – not unlike some circumstances today.
We discussed briefly what “laying down life” could look like today. Certainly financial support can be a very real, practical application. But time, energy, and attention are also parts of the “life” we all like to maintain for ourselves. Sometimes those commodities are harder to lay down than a few dollars. Preparing a meal, providing a ride, sitting and listening can all be costly, much more costly than merely talking about our loving faith (“with word or with tongue”). Someone pointed out that those kinds of activities require “letting go of my self.” That can be more challenging than letting go of just about any other “worldly goods.”
We know what love looks like because of the perfect, practical demonstration provided by Jesus.
True Belief
John then brings the focus back to assurance that his readers are on the right track, and they (and we) can know it.
We will know by this that we are of the truth
(1 John 3:19a)
John uses the same language (“of the truth”) that he has used before for “of the Father” (2:16) or “of God” (3:9, 3:10), indicating “the means or source of an activity.”[5] John is expecting future confirmation that “the truth” is indeed the “source, agency, basis, cause, and means”[6] of the believers’ faith and practice.
A person pointed out that the “by this” indicator in verse 19 points back to verse 18.
Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth.
(1 John 3:18)
This example of “know” is in the future tense, “We will know.” As we continue growing in practical expressions of love for the brothers, we will recognize more clearly that the source of our life and of our actions is the truth, the message from the beginning, the gospel.
The reality of our spiritual life (v. 14) grows as we imitate the love demonstrated by Jesus (v. 16). That process provides an assurance (v. 19b). But reading John’s words carefully (always a good idea!), note that the assurance is not to us, but from us.
We will know by this that we are of the truth, and [we] will assure [1st person plural verb[7]] our heart before Him.
(1 John 3:19)
Consider several other English translations[8] that more explicitly bring out the subject (“we”) of the verb “will assure.”
And by this, we will know that we are of the truth, and we will persuade our heart before Him. (DLNT)
This is how we know that we are of the truth and how we will set our hearts at rest in his presence: (EHV)
This is how we know that we belong to the truth and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence: (NIV)
Our actions will show that we belong to the truth, so we will be confident when we stand before God. (NLT)
Because of this, we know we are of the truth, and we will persuade our hearts of this fact before him, (NTFE)
In this thing we know, that we be of truth, and in his sight we admonish our hearts. (WYC)
and in this we know that of the truth we are, and before Him we shall assure our hearts, (YLC)
Most of the more common English versions (ESV, NASB, NIV, etc.) apparently assume the reader will automatically make the connection between the subject “we” and both of the verbs: “We know … and [we] persuade.” However, some English readers (including me) missed that connection entirely. (The connection is unmistakable in an inflected language like Greek, so the original readers understood that point immediately.)
The difference is critical. John is not saying that we are to expect some kind of emotional “assurance” (v. 19) to come over us “when our heart condemns us” (v. 20a). Most Christians know what that condemning heart feels like. We suffer shame or experience repeated failure. We doubt our spiritual reality or even our very salvation. As our group expressed it, “We beat ourselves up.”
The assurance that John describes is our response. What we know based on our love (even our imperfect love) for other believers (“the brothers”) drives our reply to our condemning heart: “We will know… and we will assure (persuade, give confidence to, even admonish) our hearts.”
Why can we assure our heart when that heart (“deceitful above all things” as one member pointed out from Jeremiah 17:9) condemns us?
for God is greater than our heart and knows all things.
(1 John 3:19b)
Our redeemed hearts are still surrounded with a crusty veneer of scar tissue from past wounds and self-protective callouses from a lifetime of small irritations. Between those scars and callouses are tender areas from more recent injuries.
Those layers around our redeemed heart build barriers to what we know. Our encrusted heart, our self-protection, the shame we feel, these all combine (often with help from the opinions of others in the world and in the church) to accuse and condemn us.
I’m aware that a thin crust has slowly been forming over my heart, weakening my appetite to know God and make Him known. Expressing irritability toward my wife can seem justified and strangely satisfying.[9]
And we respond down the spiral of self-protective seclusion.
I will harden myself until the calluses covering my heart protect me from criticism, rejection, or abuse.[10]
John’s antidote is the theme of this passage: “We know … by this…” We (John includes himself) know enough to persuade, to “talk back” when our heart condemns us. The truths John reminds us of in this passage are adequate ammunition to respond to our heart. And notice, too, that we are persuading our heart “before God,” in His presence (ἔμπροσθεν, emprosthen; “in front of, in the sight of”).[11] What “we know” is enough to contradict our self-accusing heart right in front of God, “who is greater than our heart and knows all things” (v. 20b). He certainly knows all about us and also about our advocate and our propitiation (1 John 2:1-2).
We know that our advocate who provides our propitiation surpasses any condemnation our heart brings against us. As we grow in loving others, we will know that glorious truth more and more.
Abiding Spirit
John has a lot to say about loving the brothers, laying down our lives (and our worldly goods), and how we persuade our heart based on what we know. What if someone reads all this and concludes, “I need to work a lot harder at loving other people!” This could sound a lot like all the work I need to do, all the things I need to accomplish.
John saves one more “We know by this…” in this section for his most important reminder.
We know by this that He abides in us, by the Spirit whom He has given us.
(1 John 3:24b)
Ultimately, everything John says grows from this, God’s indwelling Spirit, the third Person of the Triune God, the Comforter and Helper promised by Jesus (John 14:16-26).
Our discussion did not get very far on this topic. That is just as well, since this will be the beginning of our passage for our next discussion.
Who Is My Brother?
Two other specific questions came up during our discussion. John uses the word “brother” eight times in this brief passage. Do these words of love only apply to other Christians? Several people agreed that there are unbelievers (neighbors, co-workers, even family members) who are very difficult to love. Loving other Christians certainly can be challenging at times. What about the many unbelievers we come into contact with regularly? Does John provide justification to lessen our efforts of love for those people? Are we called to sacrificial love only toward other believers?
As always, context should be our first clue. Clearly, John is using “brother” (ἀδελφός, adelphos) to designate other believers. He also uses the plural form (3:13. 14. 16), which “can also mean brothers and sisters.”[12] The entire letter is about distinguishing true faith and correct doctrine. His ultimate purpose in writing is Christian fellowship with each other and with the Triune God with the end result being shared joy.
what we have seen and heard we proclaim to you also, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father, and with His Son Jesus Christ. These things we write, so that our joy may be made complete.
(1 John 1:3-4)
That purpose has a specific, limited scope. How are believers to relate to one another? How are believers to discern true teaching based on the behavior of the teachers? John (at least so far in his letter) has little to say about relating to outsiders. His instructions and explanations focus intently on relational holiness among believers.
However, John’s focused first letter is not all that Scripture has to say on the topic.
Earlier (1 John 2:7-8), John alluded to an old commandment and a new commandment, possibly a reference to the command repeated throughout Scripture to “love you neighbor.” Like the lawyer’s self-protective question to Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?”, we might ask, “Who is my brother?” Answering the lawyer, Jesus told the story of the good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37). The Lord intentionally made the “hero” of the story someone clearly not in the normal category of a neighbor. At the conclusion of the story, Jesus didn’t explain it. He asked the lawyer an application question, “Who proved to be a neighbor?” (v. 36, emphasis added).
The story turned the lawyer’s question around. The focus was not on how to categorize neighbors versus non-neighbors. The weight was on being a neighbor when there is an occasion to express love. The lawyer got the answer right.
And he said, “The one who showed mercy toward him.” Then Jesus said to him, “Go and do the same.”
(Luke 10:37)
What does this have to do with John’s letter about loving the brethren? Worldly goods (including time, energy, and emotions) are limited. No one can respond to every need, to every appeal for mercy. The Apostle Paul provides helpful guidance.
Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.
(Galatians 6:9-10)
Our primary concern is for other believers as expressed in 1 John, but the model and the teaching of Jesus include a wide range for showing love to others.
Whatever We Ask
A second general question during our discussion focused on verse 22. Just after describing how we can assure our condemning heart (vv. 19-20), John adds,
whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight.
(1 John 3:22)
This is another verse that can be (and probably is) abused by ignoring context. In that isolated interpretation, God is reduced to the vending machine model.
Insert the correct spiritual change, punch the right button, and God delivers. What do you want? A new zest for life? No more homosexual desires? Godly kids? Coming right up. Just stick in the right coins—daily devotions, disciplined prayer, determined obedience, faithful church attendance. God will do whatever you ask.[13]
It is difficult to imagine an image more foreign to John’s continuous theme of knowing God and our abiding love for Him and joyful fellowship. If anything, that non-relational perception of God moves us away from Him.
No one cuddles up to a vending machine. We insert the proper change, pull the appropriate lever, reach for our treat, then enjoy it as we walk away.[14]
What, then, does John mean? The surrounding context clearly contradicts that misleading interpretation. John has just described assuring our heart (vv. 19-20) in order that our heart will not condemn us (v. 21a). The result is confidence in God’s presence (v. 21b). Our response is to “keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight” (v. 22b).
These statements about assuring our heart and pleasing God echo John’s previous sweeping statement.
Beloved, now we are children of God, and it has not appeared as yet what we will be. We know that when He appears, we will be like Him, because we will see Him just as He is. And everyone who has this hope fixed on Him purifies himself, just as He is pure.
(1 John 3:2-3)
The consensus of our group was that “whatever we ask” is shaped by that hope, the anticipation of becoming more like Christ. Our ultimate motivation is to “believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us” (v. 23). However, we still are “children of God” who are “not yet what we will be,” and second things can distract us. As we continue to face our inevitable failures, where do our prayers turn?
John reminds believers of “what we know” to assure the heart of “the great love the Father has bestowed on us” (v. 3:1). The desire to grow in the experience of that love can direct our prayers more and more toward keeping His commandments. When “whatever we ask” takes that form, “we receive from Him.”
Later in this letter John repeats the thought with the qualification “whatever we ask according to his will” (1 John 5:14-15) …. It is another way of saying that people who keep God’s command and do what pleases him know God’s will. As a result, they will ask only what is consistent with what they know of God, for they are his children.[15]
As one member of our group commented, “As we grow closer to Christ our desire for carnal things decreases.” The more clearly we see the first thing of drawing near to God, the less attraction second things offer. May our time in John’s letters sharpen our first-thing focus.
[1] Dr. Samuel Johnson, The Rambler, Volume 1, Number 2, March 24, 1750, 17-18.
https://quoteinvestigator.com/2024/06/18/require-remind/#264e2c8f-cf9b-471a-9828-bbc2269274a2
Paraphrased by C. S. Lewis as ‘People more frequently require to be reminded, than to be instructed’.
C. S. Lewis, The Collected Letters of C.S. Lewis, Volume 1 (New York: HarperCollins e-books, 2009) Kindle Electronic Edition: Location 13011 (p. 772).
[2] https://www.billmounce.com/greek-dictionary/phaneros
[3] https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20John%203%3A16-18&version=MOUNCE
[4] https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20John%203%3A16-18&version=NLV
[5] https://www.billmounce.com/greek-dictionary/ek
[6] Murray J. Harris, Prepositions and Theology in the Greek New Testament (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan, 2011). 103, emphasis added.
[7] https://biblehub.com/interlinear/1_john/3-19.htm
[8] https://www.biblegateway.com/verse/en/1%20John%203%3A19
[9] Larry Crabb, A Different Kind of Happiness: Discovering the Joy That Comes from Sacrificial Love (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Baker Books, 2016), 144.
[10] Larry Crabb, Fully Alive (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Baker Books, 2013), 94.
[11] https://www.billmounce.com/greek-dictionary/emprosthen
[12] W. Bauer, F.W. Danker, W.F. Arndt, and F.W. Gingrich, A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2000), 18, (1).
[13] Larry Crabb, Shattered Dreams (Colorado Springs, Colorado: WaterBrook Press, 2001), 77-78.
[14] Larry Crabb, The Pressure’s Off: There’s A New Way to Live (New York: Waterbrook, 2018), 169.
[15] Karen H. Jobes, 1, 2, and 3 John, Zondervan Exegetical Commentary on the New Testament (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan Academic, 2014), 168.